Now its probably best to say here that I *cough* have not yet played 2018's Hitman 2. A sad state of affairs; but as much as I would've liked to have spent the last two years in a darkened room living my fantasies; just like your mum has. I couldn't. I have been working overseas and for one reason or another I've always had something else to play, watch or read.
In particular 'The EA-sy Street; The Recycled Videogame'. A mythical creature, new IP and irony simulator from EA games. One that's storming the market currently; or at least it could be if I hadn't just made it up while staring into the lifeless eyes of an IGN presenter on my computer screen.
Anyway; Hitman 2 is a strange amalgamation of both IO's most recent outings. Hitman (2016) is the game I have played. it is contained within Hitman 2 however and the levels are improved upon and so it is the way I recommend you play. Download HITMAN 2 on steam and play it through there once you've bought it.
PS I will get around to playing the second one now that I'm home.
47 Years Ago:
Loading up Hitman 2: Silent Assassin for the first time when I was a kid on my very incapable PC was an almost orgasmic experience for my tiny child mind. It was simultaneously the first time I had seen violence in videogames and the hilarity of ragdoll physics. A real eureka moment. As a young boy it was so awesome I went to school shouting from a top the nearest pile of text books about how I wanted to go bald and become a part time postman. Something my teachers actually thought I was capable of for once.
And thanks to this most recent addition to the series I want to do the same today; even if I'm much less enthusiastic about going bald.
Sandbox Stealth Killer:
Each mission in the game is a meticulously thought out death trap; teeming with opportunities for hilarity and devious death dealing. As always the missions are the real stars of the game; one particular stand out for me was a trip to Morocco; it was a crowded, loud and varied setting which amazed me with its intricate detailing and excited atmosphere. The level designers at IO have really outdone themselves. Whether its the aforementioned shisha soaked streets of Morocco or a technically revered Bond-villain-esque hospital in the Japanese mountains; they really nail their intentions... to your forehead.
The variety of settings give a real globetrotting feel throughout its potentially short or long campaign. I spent around 40 hours playing; gaining all the mastery ranks for each level before moving on. Something that gave me access to some very fun toys in the later levels and I promote the idea of doing that.
Options for Obituaries:
Our anti hero has always explored his options and dramatic ideas when coming up with methods for disposing of his often depraved, despicable and down right dim quarry. But enough about my evangelical view of yourself. 47 can get very creative in this game. Knives; guns; piano wire all return. But Dianna also kindly suggests pirate cannons, plane crashes, electrocution, crushing, robot induced surgery fuck ups, heart hiding and even sniper rifle 2 for 1's. And that's not in the way your tiny call of duty addict brain thinks of it either.
The assassinations are indeed more fun than they've ever been; the sheer amount of options crammed into he beautifully designed levels are what makes this game great.
Conclusion:
Go buy it; via Hitman 2; actually buy both; I'm going to store with you now. I'm waiting outside... look !!
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